New Fifa Rankings

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debaser

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by debaser on Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:07 pm

Allez les rouges wrote:Germans have plenty of soul, in fact invented the damn thing, just don't have expressions on their faces. I thought Blut had cleared this up already.

It's the Dutch who have, Faust-like, sold their soul.

Socrates/Plato came up with idea of souls.

Germany came up with Faust & selling your soul.

Go figure.
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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by ─ on Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:11 pm

Noah und der Bale wrote:

The Dutch, on the other hand, are simple people who enjoy cheese and crack cocaine. They've yet to sign a pact with the devil, hence their perfection of coming second

so far

true

in 2012 we will finally win the title for ALL Germans in the world

irrespective of colour , creed or passport

we will paint the world ORANGE

with von Marwijk, von Bommel, von der Vaart und von Robben Ale

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blutgraetsche

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by blutgraetsche on Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:26 pm

First of all, let me make clear that England at best are just a mere nuisance and a neverending source of quality entertainment. They aren't really 'evil', for that they're too clumsy and...let's be fair... shit. Being great traditionalists, they basically play a game that is different to the rest of us, conserved in a time capsule for a century. In '96, their media had tried a few dirty tricks to unsettle the unshakeable German team, they've basically tried to be 'evil' like the Tasmanian Devil Taz from Looney Tunes, so the team had a bit of fun and made that catchy song their own.

That said, the real evil force in international football are and always have been the Dutch. It all began in 1974, when they had a good team for the first time in their history and wanted to humiliate us in the final. They failed so spectacularly that they began to spread lies about that match, about German football in general, and did so very successfully for decades. The more success Germany had, the bigger the lies. Then they finally managed to beat us in an important match in 1988 and took off their hypocritical masks for the first time, wiping their arse with their opponents shirts after the match instead of shaking hands like civilised people do. Another highlight could be witnessed two years later, when Rijkaard spit at V÷ller, yet the likely corrupt ref sent both players off, punishing good old Rudi for typical Dutch nastiness. Finally, after decades of failure, they thought that it was time to get rid of the 'let's play "beautifully" and fail spectacularly' approach in recent times and decided to let out all their nastiness for the world to see, fouling the crap out of the opposition and playing a type of football that even made Rumpelfussball connoisseurs like otto rejoice. All the hypocrisy German fans had known for ages was finally out there, watched by billions of people.

P.S.: Germany have beaten Brazil in friendlies a few times. Meaningless though, as only the real matches count. And it wasn't the 'luck of draw', Germany took over as the dominant force in international football after Brazil's truly golden generation more or less retired in 1970, and they needed more than two decades to adjust their game to modern times. In those two decades, Germany became the most successful international team and was only overtaken in 1994, after Brazil won their fourth WC. We're still the most consistent team, but admittedly should have won more than we did. We paid for our sins, others have not. Not pointing any fingers.
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Isco Benny

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Isco Benny on Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:07 pm

And yet in head to heads the most successful team (tm) in history are well and truly lagging against the 2 teams who have won the World Cup more time - Brazil and Italy. And in recent times, have been put in their place by the new kids on the block Spain.

If Germany were a disease, it would be Pneumonia. It's a nuisance, always there or thereabouts, unspectacular, preys solely on the weak, and has delusions of being a really dangerous player in the Pandemic World, simply because it manages to knock off a few homeless, toddlers and old people every year.

Put it up against the traditional powerhouses Influenza (Brazil), or Malaria (Italy), and up and comers like Cancer (Spain) and AIDS (Holland), you realise it's nothing a hot lemsip and and a lie down can't fix. Nothing to fear.






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debaser

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by debaser on Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:32 pm

Noah und der Bale wrote:And yet in head to heads the most successful team (tm) in history are well and truly lagging against the 2 teams who have won the World Cup more time - Brazil and Italy. And in recent times, have been put in their place by the new kids on the block Spain.

If Germany were a disease, it would be Pneumonia. It's a nuisance, always there or thereabouts, unspectacular, preys solely on the weak, and has delusions of being a really dangerous player in the Pandemic World, simply because it manages to knock off a few homeless, toddlers and old people every year.

Put it up against the traditional powerhouses Influenza (Brazil), or Malaria (Italy), and up and comers like Cancer (Spain) and AIDS (Holland), you realise it's nothing a hot lemsip and and a lie down can't fix. Nothing to fear.

I like the slightly surreal disease comparison.

I'd switch Brazil and Italy:
Italy = Influenza - always present, but a hypervirulent strain breaks out sporadically when people don't expect it
Brazil = Malaria - everyone knows to expect it, but even forewarned, are rarely able to combat it

England = Leprosy. An ancient, ugly & much-misunderstood disease. It's sufferers (supporters) are social pariahs.

Argentina = Aids. Big in the 80s.

Germany = Dysentry. Kills people via diarrhoea.
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blutgraetsche

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by blutgraetsche on Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:35 pm

"AIDS" aren't up and comers, they've always been there and never killed anyone, no matter what approach they choose - a mere cold would be more fitting. "Cancer" are the new kids on the block, won a bit of silver ware after God knows how long with an exceptional generation, and need to do so over a few generations to be considered in the same echelon as the big boys - bird flu is the better choice. "Malaria" won half of their WCs at a time when 'football' looked a lot like the game England still play today, and dictators decided the outcome of matches. Their continental record isn't anything to write home about, and they clearly lack consistency. Malaria is about right.

Brazil and Germany are the only teams that have been consistent both in the WC and in their respective continental competition, Brazil less so in the Copa America actually. Brazil is cancer, while Germany is Alzheimer - you tend to 'forget' the humiliation suffered at their hands, tend to underestimate them all the time, just to come back to haunt and kill you. Guaranteed.

P.S.: England are no disease, they are the cure.
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Aristoskank

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Aristoskank on Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:16 pm

Germany are obviously hemorrhoids. That is all.
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Isco Benny

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Isco Benny on Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:45 pm

debaser wrote:
Noah und der Bale wrote:And yet in head to heads the most successful team (tm) in history are well and truly lagging against the 2 teams who have won the World Cup more time - Brazil and Italy. And in recent times, have been put in their place by the new kids on the block Spain.

If Germany were a disease, it would be Pneumonia. It's a nuisance, always there or thereabouts, unspectacular, preys solely on the weak, and has delusions of being a really dangerous player in the Pandemic World, simply because it manages to knock off a few homeless, toddlers and old people every year.

Put it up against the traditional powerhouses Influenza (Brazil), or Malaria (Italy), and up and comers like Cancer (Spain) and AIDS (Holland), you realise it's nothing a hot lemsip and and a lie down can't fix. Nothing to fear.

England = Leprosy. An ancient, ugly & much-misunderstood disease. It's sufferers (supporters) are social pariahs.

Argentina = Aids. Big in the 80s.

Germany = Dysentry. Kills people via diarrhoea.

Laugh Brilliant.

Although Blut's is pretty good too. Alzheimer's is definitely Germany = you have to be in the last throes of life to truly appreciate it's ugliness, at which point there is no coming back
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blutgraetsche

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by blutgraetsche on Thu Jun 30, 2011 5:09 pm

Talking about metaphors, there is no better summary of English football history than Monty Python's Black Knight...



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKhEw7nD9C4
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Fey

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Fey on Thu Jun 30, 2011 5:11 pm

Holland aint AIDS at all! It's the cure ffs

And they will show it in Poland and the Jewcrane by defeating AIDS(Allemagne, Italy, Deutschland and Spain)

Germany is like Cat Stevens imo, brilliant before and after the name change they turned shite!
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Isco Benny

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Isco Benny on Thu Jun 30, 2011 5:30 pm



Laugh
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Kiwi00

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Kiwi00 on Sat Jul 02, 2011 2:12 am

Noah und der Bale wrote:And yet in head to heads the most successful team (tm) in history are well and truly lagging against the 2 teams who have won the World Cup more time - Brazil and Italy. And in recent times, have been put in their place by the new kids on the block Spain.

If Germany were a disease, it would be Pneumonia. It's a nuisance, always there or thereabouts, unspectacular, preys solely on the weak, and has delusions of being a really dangerous player in the Pandemic World, simply because it manages to knock off a few homeless, toddlers and old people every year.

Put it up against the traditional powerhouses Influenza (Brazil), or Malaria (Italy), and up and comers like Cancer (Spain) and AIDS (Holland), you realise it's nothing a hot lemsip and and a lie down can't fix. Nothing to fear.


I do find it quite irritating that Italy's 4 world cups are quoted as gospel. I mean sure, they are one of the top 3 footballing nations ever, but you cannot surely count the pre-WW2 world cups played by 4 countries, especially the one handed to them on a platter by Il Duce
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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Xavier on Sat Jul 02, 2011 3:03 am

Kiwi00 wrote:I mean sure, they are one of the top 3 footballing nations ever, but you cannot surely count the pre-WW2 world cups played by 4 countries, especially the one handed to them on a platter by Il Duce
This truth isn't mentioned enough.
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Kiwi00

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Kiwi00 on Sat Jul 02, 2011 6:30 am

Yup, 2 WCs and 1 Euro since WW2, doesnt even compare to Germany, even if we can't beat the f*ckers in tournaments
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Fey

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Fey on Sat Jul 02, 2011 1:13 pm

That's harsh on Italy. Sure the 2 pre-ww2 titles can be debated, and their run to the final in 2006, Australia, Ukraine, Germany, would rival, Germany's route to the final in 2002 as being the easiest of all time.But I would still rate them above Germany, they might not be as consistant. But Italy can beat any opponent, look how close that shite 2008 team came in beating Spain! Germany isnt able to do that!
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DD

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by DD on Wed Jun 06, 2012 2:47 pm

It's time for today's FIFA ranking. Biggrin
Nothing like a good dick measuring prior to the EC.

Ooh, Germany's lost their place to us (Uruguay).

As of June 6th 2012:
Rank/ Team/ Points/ +/- Position
1 Spain 1456 0
2 Uruguay 1292 1
3 Germany 1288 -1
4 Netherlands 1234 0
5 Brazil 1155 1
6 England 1145 1
7 Argentina 1137 2
8 Croatia 1053 0
9 Denmark 1019 1
10 Portugal 996 -5
11 Chile 994 2
12 Italy 977 0
13 Russia 975 -2
14 France 964 2
15 Greece 953 -1
16 C˘te d'Ivoire 943 -1
17 Sweden 910 0
18 Republic of Ireland 907 0
19 Mexico 889 1
20 Colombia 880 3
21 Switzerland 868 -3
22 Paraguay 833 3
23 Japan 822 7
24 Australia 820 -3
25 Ghana 818 -3
26 Norway 787 -2
27 Czech Republic 771 -1
28 USA 767 1
29 Bosnia-Herzegovina 756 -2
30 Slovenia 742 -2
31 Hungary 735 4
...
33 Turkey 732 0
34 Serbia 725 -2
...
37 Peru 688 -1
...
52 Ukraine 572 -2
...
62 Poland 518 3
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The Easter Bunny

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by The Easter Bunny on Wed Jun 06, 2012 2:56 pm

I just don't understand why England are always so high up :/

Still living of 1966 Ale

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by worms. on Wed Jun 06, 2012 3:44 pm

I am so proud to support the 2 best teams in the world.European,World and South American Campiones.We've certainly earned it those 2 spots.

worms.

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by worms. on Wed Jun 06, 2012 3:45 pm

Chile,Russia,France,Ghana and Italy are all better than England.
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S4P

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by S4P on Wed Jun 06, 2012 3:49 pm

Justice for Goldado wrote:I am so proud to support the 2 best teams in the world.European,World and South American Campiones.We've certainly earned it those 2 spots.

It must be tough supporting the best 2 teams in international football, the best team in club football and the world no.1 tennis player. Who's your favourite darts player? Phil Taylor? Ronnie O'Sullivan for snooker?

Imagine trying to cope with all that success.
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debaser

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by debaser on Wed Jun 06, 2012 3:53 pm

Justice for Goldado wrote:I am so proud to support the 2 best teams in the world.European,World and South American Campiones.We've certainly earned it those 2 spots.

Don't play down your personal role in Spain & Uruguay's success. I don't think they could have done it without your support Ale

worms.

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by worms. on Wed Jun 06, 2012 4:00 pm

S4P wrote:
Justice for Goldado wrote:I am so proud to support the 2 best teams in the world.European,World and South American Campiones.We've certainly earned it those 2 spots.

It must be tough supporting the best 2 teams in international football, the best team in club football and the world no.1 tennis player. Who's your favourite darts player? Phil Taylor? Ronnie O'Sullivan for snooker?

Imagine trying to cope with all that success.

The only teams/sportsmen I support is the football teams listed in my profile,Djokovic and the Klitschkos.I don't really follow any other sports,I watch UFC now and again like that's it.
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The Easter Bunny

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by The Easter Bunny on Wed Jun 06, 2012 4:02 pm

Justice for Goldado wrote:
S4P wrote:
Justice for Goldado wrote:I am so proud to support the 2 best teams in the world.European,World and South American Campiones.We've certainly earned it those 2 spots.

It must be tough supporting the best 2 teams in international football, the best team in club football and the world no.1 tennis player. Who's your favourite darts player? Phil Taylor? Ronnie O'Sullivan for snooker?

Imagine trying to cope with all that success.

The only teams/sportsmen I support is the football teams listed in my profile,Djokovic and the Klitschkos.I don't really follow any other sports,I watch UFC now and again like that's it.

Laughing

Worms it's lucky you don't follow F1, you would love about 6 different teams.
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Isco Benny

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Isco Benny on Wed Jun 06, 2012 4:06 pm

debaser wrote:
Justice for Goldado wrote:I am so proud to support the 2 best teams in the world.European,World and South American Campiones.We've certainly earned it those 2 spots.

Don't play down your personal role in Spain & Uruguay's success. I don't think they could have done it without your support Ale

Here here. They could never have done it without Worms' loyalty, choosing to support them along with another 10 or so successful teams. The football supporter's equivalent of pic n' mix

I imagine the Basques of Athletic Bilbao are particularly keen to congratulate him on his support of Spain. Expect a ticker tape parade and street parties to welcome him on his next visit to the The San MamÚs or Camp Nou in his Spain shirt Ale
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Fey

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Fey on Wed Jun 06, 2012 4:14 pm

Justice for Goldado wrote:I am so proud to support the 2 best teams in the world.European,World and South American Campiones.We've certainly earned it those 2 spots.

But what is this list worth?

If Euroshite like Slovenia are infront of Peru?
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COTR

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by COTR on Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:50 pm

http://www.fifa.com/worldranking/rankingtable/index.html

What an awesome set of rankings.

Greece will soon be overtaking Brazil

England 4th
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Brazil 11th
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Peru 32nd


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the real white worm

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by the real white worm on Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:52 pm

England 4th lol!
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Isco Benny

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by Isco Benny on Wed Jul 04, 2012 1:04 pm

4th cheers

Haterz gonna hate.

Come at us bitches. Come at us!


110%

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by 110% on Wed Jul 04, 2012 1:06 pm

Disco Benny wrote:4th cheers

Haterz gonna hate.

Come at us bitches. Come at us!


Unbeaten at the euros Biggrin

except for penalties


Last edited by 110% on Wed Jul 04, 2012 1:07 pm; edited 1 time in total
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S4P

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Re: New Fifa Rankings

Post by S4P on Wed Jul 04, 2012 1:07 pm

3 worms on a shirt wrote:England 4th lol!


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